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A Marriage Counselor

Your girlfriend has said the words you've long dreaded. She's explained that she wants a break and to you that means this is an official break-up. You're panicked and you're worried that you'll never be able to convince your girlfriend that staying together is the right thing to do. Before you officially start grasping at any straw you can think of to get her back, you have to take a moment to reflect on what is really happening between the two of you. As concerned as you are right at this minute, you must realize that just because she says she wants a break, that doesn't mean there's no hope for the two of you. If you take the right approach in the coming days and weeks, you can actually pull your girlfriend back into your arms and make her long for a bright, happy and renewed future with you.

Give Your Girlfriend All the Time and Space She Needs


As much as you want to sit your girlfriend down and explain to her exactly why you two are meant to be, you have to avoid that impulse at all costs. This is a crucial time for the future of your relationship and if you toss her needs to the wayside that is going to breed an environment that is ripe with anger and resentment. She may pull back even stronger and for good which means that any chance you may have had for reconciliation will suddenly disappear.

By giving your girlfriend the space she requires, you are silently showing her that you value her needs more than your own. Your girlfriend must feel this if you want the relationship to blossom back into what it once was. Being completely unselfish right now is going to undoubtedly be your best approach so refrain from telling her just how much you need her and encourage her to take however long she needs to sort through what she's feeling.

Not only will your girlfriend be stunned by your generosity but she's also going to question your motives. Women are notorious for wanting a fairytale relationship and if your girlfriend feels that you're more than willing to let her go, that's going to stay with her. That will translate into her thinking of you non-stop once she does decide to create some distance between the two of you.

Support Her as You Would Any Good Friend

As much as you need to give your girlfriend the room she requires to work through her emotions, it's important that you make it clear that you'll be there for her in whatever capacity she needs. That's why it's advisable that you treat her as a cherished friend. It's a hard shift of emotions for any man to make when he's in love with his girlfriend, but you must try your best to push your romantic feelings aside and just focus on being a good friend to her.

Don't dote on her and don't call her every day. A couple of calls a week just to check in are more than sufficient in the two weeks following her decision to take some time. After that, you'd do well to not contact her more than once a week or even once every two weeks.

Whenever you do speak with her or share text messages with her, don't bring up the relationship. Instead focus on everything positive you are doing in your life right now. It's a wise idea to mention to your girlfriend that you are spending time out with friends.

It's going to sting her a bit to know that you're not spending all your time pining away for her. If she has to face the fact that you're moving on in your life even though she's taken her leave, that's a very positive thing for you. It means that she has to confront her own fears about losing you and that can actually be the impetus she needs to address the question of whether or not she's really ready for the relationship you two share to be over for good.

By accepting her desire for her own space and time and being a good friend to her, you are showing her that you only want what is best for her. You're also showing her that you can and will survive whether or not she decides to come back to you. Don't allow her to control your emotional future by sitting patiently and waiting for her to make a decision. Let her see that you're a strong, mature and emotionally healthy man who can forge ahead with or without her. That knowledge alone will make her want to prove to you that she's the woman you can't live without and she'll set out on a path to reconnect with you in a way that is deeper and stronger than ever before.

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