Break-ups are among the most painful experiences that many of us have to undergo. The pain of losing someone whom you shared your love with and looked forward to a future with – gone. This can be a devastating feeling to many and each of us has to cope somehow in order to be able to move on.
Breaking up with your partner can bring back so many memories of past relationships that have failed, betrayals, and other sad memories in life. Healing takes time because you have to go through stages before you can accept everything that happened. The old adage “Time heals all wounds” is true.
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Oftentimes, there are those who get stuck in with their ex that they are not able to move on. They blame themselves, they try to find out what went wrong and the “what-ifs” come crashing down heavily on them. They get anxious, they get depressed, they get false hopes of reconciliation.
To help you survive a break-up and avoid getting stuck with the thoughts of your ex, here are some ways that you can follow.
1. Allow yourself to grieve and let it all out
One of the effective tips to get over your ex is to grieve completely. The first few days of a break-up, you might want to let the whole world know that you are well and moving on. Let's say that you have just ended a five-year relationship – it is fair enough that you let yourself grieve for a while. Putting on a false face that you have moved on is totally unbelievable. Don't fool yourself. Call your friends and pour it all out.
Grieving varies from person to person. Some grieve by crying, writing, talking with friends, drinking, consulting a counselor, processing memories, and many more. No matter how you do it, always remember that you can always call on your friends and family to help you get through it.
2. Don't blame yourself
It takes two to tango. When a relationship ends, both parties have a role to play. The blame does not solely fall on one party alone. Do not let yourself get stuck in a blame game. One of the effective tips to get over your ex is to learn what you can about what happened in your relationship and then move on.
3. Exercise your freedom
When you are single and back in the market, you have no one to tell you what to do. There is no one to tell where you are going or someone waiting for you until you get home. You are free. Exercising your new-found freedom is one of the effective tips to get over your ex. Hop on that plane with your friend and go someplace that you have never been. Stay out as late as you even if it is just hanging out with friends. Watch TV all day without hearing any complaints. Find joy in doing all the things that you are not able to do when you were still in a relationship.
4. Don't Idealize your Ex
One of the effective tips to get over your ex is to stop idealizing your partner. Remember the bad times and the fights that you used to have. It can help you move on easier.
Remove all the memories of your ex and place them in a box. You can throw or burn them away but make sure that it is what you really want. Avoid getting your things back from your ex as well.
6. Stay Fit
Going for a workout or even just jogging in your neighborhood can be good for your hormones. Sweating out can trigger happy hormones that can prevent you from getting depressed.
7. Don't contact your ex
This is a very important tip if you want to get over your ex. Do not attempt any contact with your ex to help you move on easily.
If you are going to break-up, put a period to it. Do not let loose strings of hope hang around. It is either you are done or you aren't.
9. Pour your energy at work
Some people become lousy at their job when they are heartbroken. How about channeling the negative energy to work by working extra hard and doing a better job. This can be an effective method for many while it might not work for some. However, working hard will give you a boost in your ego and that added praise won't hurt. Throw yourself at your job and you might just find yourself to be productive.
10. Hang out with friends
Have you been seeing less of your friends when you were in a relationship? It's time to make it up to them. They'll accept you back anyway. Aside from that, they are a great way to help you through your grieving process.