It's happened. That moment that you've been anxiously waiting days, weeks or perhaps even months for. Your ex has finally broken no contact and texted you. You're overwhelmed, you're overjoyed and you're overcome with confusion about what your next move should be. It's true that once a person breaks no contact it's a clear sign that they're at the very least, curious, again, but whoever is on the receiving end of that contact, in this case you, has to handle it just right or the hope that is suddenly there will quickly fade away again.
Stay Calm, Cool and Collected When Your Ex Breaks No Contact
The fact that your ex decided to reach out and text you is obviously a very promising sign. This holds true whether the text is a simple, “how are you,” or a more involved, “I miss you.” Regardless it shows that your ex was thinking about you enough to want to open up the lines of communication again. This is a very precarious time for the relationship though so you can't launch back into a serious conversation about how much you wish you two were back together. You have to pace yourself so it's best to appear as though you are completely in control of your emotions.
That might mean that you have to put off texting your ex back for a few minutes, or in some cases, a few hours. You want to do it when you feel that you can remain objective and a bit distant.
Be Wary of Your Ex's Intentions When They Text You
Unfortunately, some ex partners simply are so nosy about what's going on in your life that they'll go on a fishing expedition via text messaging. You can typically tell if that's your ex's intention by the questions they ask and the rate at which they ask them. If you two start out texting by asking each other how you are and then your ex launches into a firestorm of questions about your current dating situation, they may just be testing the waters to see if you're available. Now, that curiosity may not be related to them wanting to get back into a relationship. They may just be looking to feed their ego. Many people secretly are thrilled when they learn that their ex hasn't moved on. They feel that the reason is all about how consumed their ex still is with them.
That's why it's imperative that if your ex does start down a path where they want to know all about your life at the moment it's best to either end the text conversation or change the subject. They'll quickly get the hint that you don't want to talk about it and also, they'll really start to wonder exactly what you've been up to which is a very good thing if you want them back.
Don't Pry Into Your Ex's Personal Life
Just as you don't want your ex to ask about what is going on in your dating life, offer them the same respect. You may be overflowing with curiosity at the moment, but if you reveal that to your ex, they'll feel that you still want them back. Naturally you do, but that's information that you need to hold close to the vest, for now.
When a person seems overly interested in what is going on in their ex's life it's a clear indicator that they aren't over them yet. In the case of an ex who is simply reaching out to be friendly, you don't want to show your heart by asking if they're seeing someone else. They may answer “yes,” in which case you'll likely be devastated and you'll find it hard to cover that up.
If you two continue down the path towards reconnection you'll learn more in good time. Seeming slightly disinterested is always the best choice.
Always be mindful of the fact that you don't truly know your ex's genuine intentions so it's best to hold back just a bit until you do. There's no need to rush back into anything. Let your ex set the pace, keep your guard up and the future will soon show itself to you. Protecting your heart should be your main objective.