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Licensed Psychotherapist

Your boyfriend dumped you a few weeks ago and although you tried to communicate with him he kept rejecting you. Now after you have about given up on getting your ex back. he sends you a text saying he misses you. That makes you think he has seen the breakup was a mistake and wants you back. You might be so happy you want to call your girlfriends and tell them the good news.

However, telling you he misses you does not wipe away all of the problems that caused the split to begin with. Just as men and women think differently, they may also see text messages in a much different way. To you, as a woman a text that even hints that he is thinking about you, seems to be a sign that he wants to patch things up and start over again. But he might not have had that in mind at all.


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When men think of a lost love, they often have regrets, but it usually last for a very short time. However, if your ex boyfriend had a moment of feeling low about the breakup, he might have sent the message on an impulse. He might have been looking for something and saw your phone number or picture and had some memories of the good times he had with you. But, it might have only lasted for a short time and he is over the feeling.

He also might have wanted to get a positive reaction from you in order to feed his ego. Men know that telling a woman he misses her will push her emotional hot buttons and make her feel a surge of love. But, I hope you haven't been too quick to answer his text. If you have sent a reply saying you miss him too and still love him, it could be all he was wanting to know.

Men will often think of an ex girlfriend and wonder if she is still waiting for him. He might have had a bad day and he needs a boost. Replying immediately to his text may be all of the boost he needs and you won't hear from him again. However if you wait a few hours or a day before answering, it shows him you are staying busy and not just sitting around moping.

When you answer your ex, simply say something like it was good to hear from you and i hope things are going great for you. This does not commit you in any way. It's just a courteous acknowledgement of his text. If he is serious and really misses you, it will open the lines of communication between you again and you might find that he is sincere and does want you back.

The game of love is often like a game of cards. You never want to lead with your best cards. Always try to keep an ace in the hole and do not be surprised at anything your partner does.

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