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Couples often fight, and there is nothing remarkable about that. However, some fights get nasty, and they end up being a terrible and traumatic episode for both. Insults, abuses and even forms of physical violence creep in as the trouble escalates. The question is whether you can save your relationship after a major fight, or does it spell permanent doom? If you are interested in making an attempt to revive your relationship, the good news is that it can be done. However, it will take a special effort.

Recover Your Composure


The first thing you need to do, in order to save your relationship after a major fight is recover your composure. It is a vital step, because in the aftermath of the fight, you will be dealing with an abnormal amount of stress and emotional pressure. If this is the first time you have fought in such a way, you may be scared, confused and deeply hurt. Your mind is facing the strain of a trauma. In this circumstance, give yourself and your partner some space.

Also, rather than indulging angry emotions and reflecting too deeply on things that were said and done during the fight, give yourself a break and try to do things that will help you calm down. It is important that you realize that both of you were at your worst behavior, and may not have meant to say such ugly things.


When you have recovered your basic composure, it is time to apologize to your partner. You need to make a strong impression with the apology, so that it can counter the ugliness of the fight. If you can somehow make the apology more memorable than the fight itself, that would be a great outcome to save your relationship. However, you know your partner best and what they would appreciate.

If your partner seems a little cold or confused or uncertain about accepting your apology, that is ok. Give them that license. Everyone does not recover the same way from a trauma or at the same pace. An unusual incident requires you to be unusually understanding.


Once some time has elapsed and you are feeling calmer, you can then begin to evaluate what led to the fight and such violent emotions, and how could they have been prevented. Could you have done something differently? It is important to think of these things, if you really want to revive your relationship, because you would want to prevent such a chain of events from happening again.


After some thinking is done, you need to approach your partner and discuss the problems that led to the fight and possible solutions. It has to be a time when both of you are calm and composed and feeling strong enough to face what happened without being overwhelmed. The discussion is vital, if you are to revive your relationship and prevent such an ugly episode from ever happening again.

Ultimately, whatever the cause of the fight, self control is something both of you will need to work on, if you want to save your relationship after a major fight and keep it going for a long time. You cannot let your emotions get away with you to an extent that you lose all self control.

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