Our romantic relationship often is the centerpiece of our existence. It makes sense when you consider that your happiness is often interwoven with feeling valued, loved and appreciated by the man in your life. When you two are close and deeply connected, those moments can feel like a type of euphoria. You imagine that no one else in the world has ever felt what you two feel. That changes dramatically when your relationship hits low points. If you two argue it can make it very difficult for you to focus on anything else. Any type of strife with your man causes a level of stress that is difficult to shoulder. It becomes even more complicated when the relationship starts to unravel. If your guy suddenly decides that he wants to be single, that's a blow to your heart. Saying, “my boyfriend doesn't want to be in a relationship anymore,” is heart wrenching for any woman. Knowing how to repair the damage so he does want to be with you is crucial.
If your boyfriend doesn't want to be in a relationship anymore, you have to accept that, at least for the time being. It's not easy to do that and it's certainly understandable why you may feel the need to bombard him with emails or calls all in a desperate attempt to get him to reconsider. If you do these things, however natural they feel at the time, you'll be devaluing yourself as a woman and future partner to him. You'll be showing him that all of your self-worth is connected to him. Men don't want to be with women who define themselves through their relationships. You have to be strong and stay calm when your boyfriend decides to move forward in his life without you.
That's not to say that you have to let him go, in an emotional sense. You need to create a new connection with him that will eventually grow into an even stronger bond than you two had in the past. The best and most effective way to do this is to approach him from a place of platonic friendship. Men are very open to the idea of being friends with women they've been romantically involved with. Tell him that you think it would be great to be friends. He'll likely welcome this and it will allow you to stay in his life while you work on getting closer to him again.
Being a good friend to him is very important. You need to show your boyfriend that you can be someone who is positive in his life. Ask him out for coffee or lunch sometimes and share what's going on in your life. Stay invested in his by offering your guidance or assistance whenever he needs it. If you can transform into his most trusted advisor and confidante, the romantic feelings are bound to be re-awakened. In time, he'll start to see you as the woman he loves again and this time, you'll have the basis of a strong and committed friendship to build on.