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Mental Health Therapist

What do you think is the absolute best thing you can do to get your wife back?

Go ahead, I want you to speculate about how to save your marriage. Take a guess… I'll wait.


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Got it? Do you have an answer to the question “What is the best thing I can do to get my wife back?”

Alright, what's your answer? What would your advice be?

What Does This Have to Do With You & Learning How to Save Your Marriage?

Just keep reading, by the end of this article I want you to tell me if your answer has changed.

I may not know you or have every bit of information regarding your history, but I do know that you're a good husband, and so I know that you would do – anything – to save your marriage (including marriage counseling, ugh!).

It's difficult to make the distinction between dignity and the worth of your marriage, and making the separation between unbridled emotion and cool control is certainly no easy task.

Lots of people fail to avoid the same mistakes that you're making with your wife, so it's okay… Don't beat yourself up, just take this as a sign for you to make change.

Even if you're not the beggar type, you're guilty, I'm sure, of something else that's proven to be harmful behavior to the way your wife perceives you.

In this situation, I know that it's hard not to be…

  • Defensive, about whose fault it is
  • Pessimistic, about your chances of reviving your marriage
  • Cynical, about love, life and your happiness
  • Negative, in your attitude and day to day behavior
  • Desperate, when it seems like all hope is lost
  • A Beggar, when you would willingly give up anything to have her back

But this is important: You have to do your best not to be any of those things. The more you grovel… The more you put down yourself, your marriage or your wife… The more you lose hope, confidence and charm… The worse off your marriage becomes.

The key to getting your marriage back on track and renewing the spark that you've lost does NOT lie in logic, rhyme or reason. In this crisis you are facing, you won't be able to convince your wife to stay around with your words or with your actions, it will be with your attitude that she finally comes around.

Now is the time to start the process of attitude adjustment to save a marriage. All problems are solvable; even though it might hurt, this is how you're going to solve this one.

The more you try to communicate with her and “work things out”, the more she is going to in turn shut you out and ignore you. The more you continue these harmful behaviors try to break through to her and open a channel of communication with her, the stronger and thicker her iron wall of mental defense will become.

Especially when couples are on the brink of divorce, when you make your wife feel suffocated – Whether it's through groveling, persistence, communication, or just a plain negative attitude – It's like digging yourself deeper into a hole and it's making the light of your marriage further and further away.

Want Your Wife to Crave YOU? Become Like the Lion

Women are biologically programmed to follow strength, success (not necessarily monetary) and leadership, and a negative attitude is not one of the defining qualities of any of those traits. You need to think of yourself like a Lion – A primal depiction of a leader.

Lions don't beg.

Lions don't compromise.

Lions don't grovel, and lions don't try to 'communicate' their problems away.

A Lion will find the problem and they kill it, plain and simple. They're confidant in themselves, and they know that even if things don't go the way they want or intend, that it doesn't really matter.

Because after all, even if you don't get your way, you're still a mother f!&%in' lion and nothing will change that.

If you tap into that the primal attraction that drives the actions of every woman, then saving your marriage and breathing life back into your relationship will be a piece of cake, and on top of that you'll see yourself as the man you're meant to be, and life will treat you better because of it.

How to Save Your Marriage When Reality Strikes

This is what you have to do to create love – You have to make your wife FEEL like she wants to follow you. You have to make her WANT to make love without any persuasion on your part. It sounds hard, but it only requires an adjustment of perception.

If your wife feels like you're the one trying to force her to change her mind then you can bet your bottom dollar she won't be coming back anytime soon. But if you can make her desire you all on her own, then every reason that she has for leaving you will suddenly come into question in her mind.

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