You can't allow anything your ex boyfriend does after a breakup make you think any less of yourself. He is going to try tormenting you by dating other women and bragging about how you are begging him to come back to you because that is just the way men are. This can cause you to lose sleep, not eat properly and go around without caring how you look. None of this will make you attractive to the man you are trying to get back.
Constantly sending text and calling him with pleas for his love will not help either. All of these actions are giving your ex boyfriend control and building his self esteem while your self esteem sinks lower and lower. It's not easy to think of yourself when you see your life being blown apart, but you have to get a grasp on your emotions and show him your life can go on without him.
As long as he thinks you are waiting for him to show you a bit of attention, your ex boyfriend will keep pushing you away. The longer that he can keep you on the string, the more time he will have to play around. Your life is on hold, but his life is going great and he has time to go drinking with his friends and make a play for other women.
He can only do these things because he knows you are still waiting for him and that gives him a sense of security. Things would change pretty fast if you took his security blanket away. Your ex would feel more exposed and begin to worry about what would happen if you wouldn't be there to catch him when he falls. What if he tries to contact you and you are not there?
He would not be so sure of himself and wonder if you cared for him anymore. To get your ex back, this is what you have to make happen. You have to make him feel that you have left him out in the cold and he is all alone. Isn't that the way your ex boyfriend made you feel when he dumped you and it made you desperate to get him back.
All of this might sound like two kids playing a game and it is. Remember when you were in the fourth grade and boys used to tease you? The more you showed that the teasing bothered you, the more the boys pestered you. However, if you ignored them, the teasing would stop. Although you are grown, a breakup is a similar situation.
If you walk away from your ex and don't act like the breakup is bothering you anymore, your ex boyfriend will stop rejecting you. If he really loves you, he will be the one who is desperate and start chasing you again. If he is over you it will be a hard thing to face, but you are better off knowing it now so you can keep your self esteem and start a new life of your own.