Everyone know by now that relationships are hard work. No matter the stage our relationship with our partner is at, we sometimes have thoughts of breaking it off. Even if the thought is only brief and in response to an argument that you feel like you'll never find a resolution to, it crosses our mind. While the thought usually passes, especially if you are in a long-term relationship, sometimes it sticks and it feels like it truly is time to call it quits. However, even if it's just relationship that is getting off the ground, it's never good to just end the relationship without taking the time to really determine if you really want to end it.
Though you may know that it's good to think things through first before making any major decisions, you may not know where to start. Many times all we can focus on is what happened to set our thoughts about a breakup in motion rather than on what can be done to fix it or all of the positives. Here are a few things to consider before breaking it off for good.
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Are you jumping to conclusions?
If the cause for you wanting to breakup has to do with something your partner did or didn't do, then you need to consider if you're jumping to conclusions. Likewise, if you haven't discussed the issue with your partner, it's possible that you are drawing a false conclusion. For instance, if your partner was late in getting home, do you automatically think he was cheating or doing something he shouldn't have been? Take the time to talk it through with your partner, it may not be what you think.
Is it a surface-level issue?
Most surface-level issues can be worked out if you are dedicated enough to your partner. For example, if you are upset because your partner forgot your anniversary, don't think it means they don't care about you. Your partner may have other things on their mind, and in reality, forgetting something like a date is simply on the surface. It can be fixed. Something like abuse-related issues is much more serious, and is a sign you should get out of the relationship immediately.
Have you given yourself a cool-off period?
If you are feeling on the fence about your relationship, then take some time “off” and go for a walk by yourself or go on a mini weekend getaway without your partner. The time away can give you time to cool off and think about what your sticking points really are rather than getting caught up in the moment.
If you are still certain you want to break things off after taking these items into consideration, then it's probably time to let it go. However, if any of these points make you pause and think, then it might be worth figuring out a way to work things out. Sometimes our emotions block out all of the good parts and force us to focus on the bad. If you take the time to determine why you feel the way you do, you can redirect your focus onto fixing the issue rather than ending the relationship because of it.