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How can a man who was so attentive and loving while he was in a relationship with you turn into a world class jerk the minute he dumps you? This is a question that is so puzzling to many women. You can almost accept the fact that he no longer wants to be with you, but that doesn't excuse his deliberate attempts to hurt you.

Your ex boyfriend was no doubt hurt by the breakup, however, you can't allow someone to intentionally cause you pain and humiliation. But, despite his being a jerk, you can't help still being in love with him either. That makes dealing with his actions a problem and the only way you can solve a problem is to find out what is causing it. Which means that you have to learn why your ex boyfriend keeps being a jerk.


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Many men are slow to mature and that makes them act like a spoiled brat if they don't always get their way. Others put up a shield when they are hurt and try to keep the object that hurt them away. Yet, you have to face the fact that some men are just downright mean. However, if you had a loving relationship with your ex boyfriend, it would indicate that he must have shown some good qualities during that time.

If he feels that you did something to hurt him, your ex may be acting like a jerk as a way of defense. He may still be in love with you, but he's afraid to let you get close to him again because he doesn't want to be hurt again. As long as he acts like a jerk, your ex boyfriend hopes ttat you will leave him alone, but as long as you keep trying to get him to talk the worse he will hurt you.

The sad part of all of this is that your ex boyfriend may not even be aware of how badly he is hurting you. In fact every time he sees you or hears your voice could be so painful to him that he instinctively lashes out and tries to drive you away and then feel sorry. This is why you have to give up on the man you love at least for a while. You are not doing yourself or him any good as long as you keep trying to make contact with him.

You have to give both of you a chance to get over whatever caused the split and the only way you can do that is not see or hear from the other person for a while. Your only chance of getting back the man you love is to let him realize that whatever he feels you did to hurt him was unintentional. Nothing you can say at this time will change his attitude toward you immediately. If he loves you, time will be the best healer and soon he will be the one to contact you.

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